It's All Karma or Something just happening for a reason...

     Well, from the very first line itself, I would like to write something about Karma. Well, I am no philosopher to talk about it, but something related to it will describe it very well. That's what I will try to do my best. I just happened to have forgotten that I have created this blog, to write all about my thoughts, my dreams, and various things I fail to say aloud to people who care for me, to people who matter to me, and to people who make a difference in my life. But often, I fail to express myself through conversations I have with people, so I try to write. Yes, most of the friends who know me will be laughing at this statement that I write. It's been a long time since I have written something. So just two days back, I visited my blog page and felt like I am not writing anything. Or maybe nothing is happening with me to write it down. Well, staying in Bangalore is becoming difficult, as I still fail to make friends with whom I could share my feelings or who would just make me feel like home. I miss my life back in Pune, my friends, my family, everyone. So, daily I wake up with this one thought, which is to stay busy with work, come back, search for jobs, give interviews, and go back to the people I miss the most. But not everything happens as planned. The events are already written somewhere; all you have to do is work hard and try to give your best to make things work for you. The past 2 weeks, I have been trying hard to stick to the same plan, even though I was disappointed with every other interview I failed to crack. And there were other things planned to test me. So before I get into any details, let me put it ahead as Dhruv's story, the character I use to speak out my emotions. So here it goes...

The last 2 days have been a hell of a journey for Dhruv. He wasn't keeping well since last week and was unable to apply for any jobs. The work pressure had always been a never-ending headache for him. But he wanted to keep himself busy and didn't want to stay back home; even when he had a fever, he refrained from taking rest. Something was going on in his mind, and he just wanted to spend time in the office. But once he was back from work, he was directly collapsing in bed. This Wednesday, it so happened that he had planned to go to the office and come back in the first half of the day. But like I said, there was something else planned for him. His manager was on leave, so he was stuck in the office and couldn't go back home. He decided to have some juice as he was fasting for the day. There was a girl in his team he used to like, who was always seated next to him. The daily conversations happened with her, and also she had accompanied him for a movie, say like once or twice. So he did have a liking for her, a motivation that kept him going to work. It did happen that she was called by the HR person, and Dhruv was unable to know the reason as nobody disclosed anything. He tried to ask the manager around, and it was some kind of training that she had to attend that was told to him. Dhruv was convinced for a moment, but still, something seemed fishy, and he was unable to believe them. It had already been 3 hours, and Dhruv had been out for lunch when he got to know that the girl had cried a lot after the HR meeting.

Another hour passed, and this time Dhruv lost his patience and dialed his manager's number to inform him about the situation, as it was both a concern for the girl and losing on the day's productivity. He told him that she had not been at her desk for almost 4 hours, and nobody was ready to share any updates regarding the situation. He clearly mentioned about productivity to his manager and not about his concern for her. Somewhere he was unable to digest the fact that she wasn't beside him. He wanted to know everything that was happening at that time. His manager informed him to talk with the floor manager and get the details; he did the same. Later, he was informed that there's a POSH concern raised by the girl, and we are investigating the matter. Kindly give us some time; I will personally tell you everything that has happened. Hearing this, Dhruv was a bit relaxed, thinking maybe the girl had raised some complaint against the trainer in the office. She had already spoken about him 2-3 days back to Dhruv. Naïve Dhruv was unaware that something else was going on in the background.

The day ended, and the girl was back at her place. Dhruv decided not to say anything, just asked her to complete the work and call him once she is back home. He wasn't sure if that was the right decision, rather he was unsure of how to react to such a situation. The floor manager called Dhruv later, once the decision was made by the HR and the operations committee. The girl was found kissing in one of the training rooms, and both the trainer and the girl agreed to this. So, as per the company policies, both will be terminated from their respective duties, effective tomorrow. Hearing this decision, Dhruv tried his best to stay calm and have a proper discussion with the entire staff present in the conference room. At that moment, Dhruv was not sure if he should trust the girl or not, whether she is being framed into this, or she has actually committed the sin. He came back home and tried to forget everything, but he was unable to do so. His roommates later in the evening tried to make fun of him, saying she went for movies with you and kissed someone else. "You've been cheated, my friend," and they continued to play all sorts of sad songs they could find from the entire Bollywood collection available on YouTube. Dhruv continued to laugh at each and every song that was played. He knew that these songs were actually making him laugh, but somewhere down the line, he was laughing at himself. But these songs helped him relax, and even after he spoke with her, he didn't feel any stress. He decided to let go of the feelings he was developing in himself. Just before he could go back to bed, his roommate asked him, and at that moment, he realized something about himself, which he told his roommate. He told him, "I don't know why this is affecting me so much. I only liked that girl; I was never in love with her. So if she has done something like this or not, why am I not able to let it go and be normal? Why is this thing affecting me so much?" His roommate clearly replied, "Dhruv, you have feelings for her, and I can see that currently you are very angry with her." Immediately Dhruv replied back, "Yes, you are right, maybe I do have feelings for her. You know something, she has got that old Dhruv back in front of me, which took me 12 years to get rid of. And now I am not able to understand what I am supposed to do; she would be leaving."

Dhruv had a very stressful day, and he desperately wanted answers to these thoughts that were running in his mind. He decided to sleep peacefully once his roommates managed to get him out of this stress. He was happy that he was not alone that day. He thanked God, and he slept.

So, it did happen later, somewhere Dhruv was seated with his friends in a café when he saw Radhika enter inside. He immediately looked elsewhere, but his friend Rahul called her name. She came to their table and greeted everyone. Dhruv slowly looked towards her and couldn't believe if she was the same Radhika he was once in love with. She had changed a lot. She looked as if she was stressed and looked like a typical Bengali lady in her late 30s. Dhruv remained calm and greeted her with a smile as he stood up at his place. Later, he moved away along with her. They both spoke for some time. Dhruv told Radhika he is here with his friends and usually comes to the restaurant every weekend for coffee. Whereas she informed him that she was here for their first wedding anniversary. Dhruv smiled on hearing this and congratulated her. He went back to his friends as her husband entered the restaurant.

He looked at her husband and smiled at himself, as later, his daughter came shouting and running towards him, along with his beautiful wife. He played with his daughter in the restaurant as people around were smiling and clicking pictures of his daughter. He knew Radhika was watching him, so he looked at her once when his alarm started to ring. It was a dream. Dhruv saw Radhika in his dreams with all that had happened to him a day back. He gave thought to this as to why she was in his dream and why it had to do something with Karma. He had a fresh start to the day as he couldn't stop smiling after what he saw in the dream. He was happy with the fresh start of the day. So, here's what he came up with something related to his dream.

You always keep thinking that when things are going great, something bad happens. But it's not what you always think; there's always a reason for things to happen. Dhruv getting to see Radhika in his dream was a reason to tell him. It's okay to be the person you once were. It's okay to live life again the way you always dreamt of. It's okay to be the person who could fall in love with someone once again, the way he once was a few years back. Life is always a flow of events that happen with you to let you know it's okay if you didn't make it to the dream job. If you didn't succeed in getting a high-paid job or if your life is still miserable or not the way you had planned it. Everything happens for a reason, and it serves. Falling in love with someone is not a bad thing, but expecting the same from them is surely something which you should not be doing. Also, for Dhruv, where he felt that he is not successful. In his dream, he found that he was very happy with his life where he still gets to hang out with his people. He is not that successful as he has promised Radhika he would be. But he is happy in his life, and that is pretty much close to success. He doesn't need a reason to be happy. His good Karma always gives him good people around, so maybe that was one of the reasons he was not alone the other day after the incident.

So it's like if life gives you a hundred reasons to cry, Dhruv still has a thousand reasons to smile; it's all because of Karma - What you give is what you get back.